JOIN OUR FOGHORN RECALL CAMPAIGN!

Of all the odious servants of the right wing—Jerry Falwell, Ken Starr, Britney Spears—none is more offensive than Rep. Blanton Foghorn of West Carolina. Foghorn carries water for the SUV Tonnage Association. He smokes tobacco in his Capitol Hill office—imagine what the founding fathers would think of that! Foghorn has accepted millions in campaign donations from the Saudi Fuels Association. His far-right voting record includes votes in favor of the death penalty for errors on welfare applications and supporting airstrikes against U.N. headquarters.

Yet every two years, he’s re-elected by a landslide margin. You might think this shows that the people of West Carolina are not correct. But we know better. (We always do.) The people of West Carolina simply need to learn the truth about Blanton Foghorn!

What’s the truth about Foghorn?

For one thing, he has sex with his interns—but it’s always really bad sex. We possess the videotapes. Although, for humanitarian reasons, we will only release the audio portions.

For another, Foghorn does not drink martinis at lunch. He drinks frozen white zinfandel spritzers. How do you think his buddies in industry will feel when word on this gets out?

We have more on Foghorn, much more, and if he doesn’t resign we will leak every humiliating detail. In the meantime, join our recall campaign.